Compassion 2018

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Compassion is Allowing for Discernment

Compassion is … allowing oneself to be discerning. In the feel-good rebellion of rejecting archaic fundamentalism and embracing new age enlightenment, it may seem like a great idea to drop judgement. And this is true – judgement is unkind and ….judgy – an ego creation. But let us not forget to use our wisdom for higher guidance and to remain discerning in all situations and all relationships. One of the best pieces of advice that I heard from a rabbi was when choosing relationships – friendship, business, marriage – one is to look at not what you like in someone because there is much to like in most people, but to look at what you don’t like in someone and discern if you can live with those. If someone leaves dirty socks on the floor, can you live with that? If someone speaks petty and nasty words about others, can you live with that? Also, how does someone behave when they don’t get what they want or when you don’t give them what they want? Do they become manipulative, angry or use emotional blackmail? There’s amazing books and resources on these subjects (pm me if you want suggestions). Using our wise judgement – meaning our gift of discernment— is building a healthy and compassionate world for ourselves and others.
27th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion
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Compassion is Healing Shame

Compassion is … healing shame. “Shame is all about not wanting to feel what you feel, and not wanting to know what you know.” Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolk
So spend the time to feel what you’re feeling, so you can know what your body and soul want you to know. This is the healing of PTSD. I feel blessed to do the Somatic healing work I do which includes healing shame which is always a part of the trauma, anxiety, and mindbody pain symptoms of my clients and self.
21st day of the Jewish month of Av- the month of Compassion
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Compassion is Soothing the Nervous System

Compassion is … listening to soothing music. According to Stephen Porges, our nervous system gets cued into what is safe and what is not safe. Much of these cues comes from the auditory system. For example, the articulation and prosadic melodies of the social folk songs of the ’60’s were very calming to the nervous system. Even though the words spoke of intense subjects, the harmonized sounds, triggered people to feel safe. My father always had the stereo system playing these kind of songs in my childhood, and now I have an understanding as to why it felt so soothing.
19th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion
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Compassion is International Rescue

Compassion is … the international rescuing of the 12 boys and their coach from the cave. When Thailand put out an international call to help find and save the boys, there was a huge response. Over 1000 experts were involved in the rescue mission, people from Israel, UK, US, Japan, China, Australia, and other countries. Compassion and Unity. Just what the world needs.
16th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion
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Compassion, Angels & the Baal Shem Tov

Compassion is … in our hands. Mystical Judaism says that angels are created by our actions and words. Most of us aren’t on the vibration to sense the myriads of angels that accompany us, but they are there and a tzaddik (a very righteous, spiritually attuned person) can sense them and discern what kind of angels they are.
This is a story of the Baal Shem Tov, a holy Jewish sage of the 1700’s: A man once spoke disparagingly of the Baal Shem Tov. The next day the holy sage confronted him about his slander. The man said “who told you of my private discussions with my friends?” The Baal Shem Tov said “an angel told me.” The man replied ” angels wouldn’t have told you because angels don’t gossip.” The Baal Shem Tov replied “This angel does – it was created by your slander. His very presence informed me of how he was created.” (Lazer Gurkow, Chabad.org.).
To the opposite, just think how many angels can be created by our kind and compassionate words 🙂
13th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion
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Compassion is Entering the Garden of Another

Compassion is … when “one person enters the interior garden of the other and walks through it without trampling any of the flowers, without blaming anyone for the presence of weeds, with great appreciation for all the time, pain, and growth it took to be the way it is.” (David Richo)
11th of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion

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Compassion is Believing in Someone

Compassion is … being the one who believes in someone. Sometimes it takes only one angel ( a human one) to be that supportive, compassionate witness to change someone’s life for the good. I love reading Southwest magazines because they tell such inspiring tales. This one I read awhile ago and it touched my heart. Jason Bishop was passed around in the foster care system, being the son of drug addicted, violent parents. He was lucky to be taken in for many years by one mom who loved him and told him that she would forever be his mom even when the foster system took him and passed him around to others. He promised to return to her and did, at eighteen, to the woman who allowed him to grieve the past that was a nightmare and to embrace a life that was beyond belief. He grew to be a successful magician as well as a kind, honest man. That’s the magic compassion can do.

10th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion

 

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Compassion is Knowing Learning Styles

Compassion is … knowing children’s learning styles. And our own. Each one of us has our own individual conative style (Kathy Kolbe) and our own energy style and these effect how we learn. It breaks my heart over and over when children get damaged and think that there is something wrong with them and feel shame for not understanding things because a teacher or a school insists on teaching for only one type of energy type and conative style. We’re just not made from one mold and it’s so important for schools and teachers to understand this. When I’m with my clients, I’m careful to have an understanding of how they take action in the world and what their energy style is so that they are in alignment with their being.

8th day of the Jewish month of Av – the month of Compassion

 

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